Hello lovely people,
Today I'm talking about the after effects of divorce and how it can bring on depression. Depression is extremely common after a divorce, even if it was you that ended the marriage there can still be feelings of displacement, which can still affect your mood.
Symptoms of depression
Divorce can be extremely painful, become difficult, messy and involve friends an family. Informing those around you, that things have not worked out can leave you with feelings of loss and loneliness. In some cases these feelings can develop into a level of depression and can go unnoticed for sometime. Lets look at some of the symptoms of depression;
Lack of appetite
Loss of interest in hobbies or normal activities
Over sleeping or Insomnia
Feelings of hopelessness or worthlessness
Problems with focusing/concentrating
Thoughts or attempts of suicide
There are other classic symptoms of depression, which can be seen in your behaviour. These include low performance at work or absences. Not turning up for appointments of fighting. Many will cut themselves off from friends and family.
You may find yourself visiting your local GP, who will suggest therapy or if the symptoms are severe may prescribe medication to help with adjustment issues.
There are 8 known SSRIs (Selective Serotonin Retake Inhibitors) antidepressants used in this country and usually given with the understanding that some type of therapy must be given along side. If you are prescribed a SSRIs, it can take up to 2 to 4 weeks before you feel any effects and you will usually be put on a 6 month course. Drugs often used are Prozac, Cipramil, Seroxat and Lustral.
In counselling it is more common to use Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) as a form of therapy. Your counsellor will work with you, to identify issues in the way you think about yourself, help you control your thoughts and behaviour in a more conscious way.
While you are waiting for appointments with your counsellor, it maybe suggested that you try new ways of expression or new coping skills, which may help you in difficult times.
Look around facebook and find yourself a support group, that you can talk to and see how others deal with coping with the same situations. Facebook groups;
Divorce support group uk
Divorce, Separation and Single's support
Father's Justice Uk Support & Advice Group
Mother's Rights: Custody, Child Support and More
Love Your Body
Alcohol and binge eating, can lead to putting on weight, which is not good for anyones mood. Get up and go somewhere, 30 minutes a day can help your mind, body and soul.
Where's That Diary?
Diary's or journals can be a great coping tool. There are going to be many thoughts about marriage, divorce and what happens now? It's good to write them down, all the feelings and doubts on paper, so you can see it as it is.
I Pity The Fool That Disturbs Me Now
Make time for yourself, turn that mobile off and run a bubble bath. Do little things like getting your nails done, remember it's the little things that make us feel good.
Get That help, Don't Be Ashamed
There are friends and family watching and waiting for you to ask for help. You are going to feel tired and overwhelmed at times, especially if you have children. Babysitting maybe needed for an hour or two, just to get your head together. Or someone to help with house chores or help cook a few meals that can last a day or two.
Get Yourself Up and Out
Getting out of the house and being around others can help take your mind off things, remind you of who you are around others and give you a mood boost. But remember this is your new life, so pick people who are interested in you and having fun. Don't pick people who wish to dwell on your situation, it is about you and the new way of thinking and living. Good friends can help you move on.
Once you have all these in place, you are well on your way to a bright new future and inner happiness. All you need to do is keep up with your appointments with the counsellor, ask for as much help as you need and remember that the counsellor is there for you and will provide a listening ear when you need.
Yes there is life after divorce, with people around you and new friends you can achieve anything you want. Learn new ways of coping, new ways of looking and loving yourself.
Here at ZenCentre I wish you success in finding your new beginning